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Reachmas

The true meaning of Reachmas?

Reachmas is an annual intergalactic festival celebrating the might of Reach and its influence on the League. Its main mascot is Father Reachmas, actually Jorgey, called so because he is the Father of both the Reachite species and all the other Composed planets. On Reachmas Eve, Jorgey dresses up in his Father Reachmas costume and flies around in a forklift pulled by magic Moa, delivering the PAIN to all the good little Girls and Grunts throughout the Galaxy.

For most of the other, slightly less unhinged members of League society, Reachmas Eve, Reachmas Day and the day after Reachmas Day (called Snapping Day) provide a triple-bank-holiday which is much appreciated by the hard working citizens of League society. It also provides an opportunity for family gatherings, social interactions or other such ventures.

Nevertheless, the true meaning of Reachmas is not known to a single member of the League. Only Jorgey knows the true meaning of Reachmas, and he keeps that secret locked firmly away. However, Father Reachmas will forever capture the imaginations of children everywhere no matter what the meaning of Reachmas may be, even if it does involve the PAIN.

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